Before I begin, I want to start by saying that I do not promote promiscuity, but I do promote the need for variety in the course of one’s sex life. Promiscuity is almost taboo as it borders along the word whore or hoe. I like to joke and say most of us were whores at one time, but it’s a tough pill to swallow. But variety….variety sounds like we have given ourselves options. I am a believer in variety as it presents the opportunity to compare. Comparison is important. We learn to know what we like and don’t like in a partner. Of course, it is a task to find everything in one person, but that is the fun part.
I was talking to a girlfriend who recently slept with a guy for the first time. She said he couldn’t fuck, and she went on to say how the previous guy she was with was better. But who is to say the new guy did not think the same thing about her? He has pleased someone before her, he just did not please her.
In my quest of variety , I developed what I have called the Two-Time Rule. I found that most “first times” are not all they should be. More times than not, it will be awkward and either really, really short or really, reeeeeeaallly long for no good reason. So, based on my theory that the first time will suck or linger along the lines of mediocrity, I decided that a second chance needed to be given to conclude if the guy was a good prospect for future sexual endeavors.
Once the rule was implemented, it never steered me wrong. I weeded out the ones that did not please me. I felt confident in saying “he can’t fuck for shit” and meaning it. I learned what made me cringe and what made me scream (in the good way).
Again, I am not saying to sleep with any and everything. Be selective and not picky. Your “variety” awaits and remember to be open to failure as second chances are almost always a good idea.